sanandreas-guginoHow many times can one country be destroyed? Well, when it comes to Hollywood, the opportunities are literally endless.  The latest trailer for “San Andreas,” starring Dwayne Johnson, serves as no exception.  We have seen America go anywhere from being blown up by aliens, to being thrust entirely underwater by natural causes.  No wonder we’ve got issues here, we’re obsessed with seeing our homeland get demolished! But that’s another issue for another time.

Although the story is cliche, this trailer was pretty darn cool.  For us Angelenos, we’ll immediately recognize some stock-footage-type videography sweeping over the Griffith Observatory with the massive city of Los Angeles making up the backdrop, all played over an eerie but somehow serene cover of “California Dreamin'” by the Mama’s and the Papa’s. Great song choice for this, by the way.  Our main macho man Ray (Johnson) is seen with a couple of beautiful young women, assumed to be his daughter Blake (Alexandra Daddario) and wife Emma (Carla Gugino); just a couple of the token action movie hotties whom we’re sure to see hanging from buildings as the hand of The Rock’s mighty grip desperately tries to save them…Tangent complete.

san-andreas-daddarioThen, some sluglines soon ask us “Where will you be” when it all “falls apart.”  Well, that’s strikingly bleak. Then we get yet another been-there-done-that shot of a large, metropolitan city falling to pieces.  Based on the title, we can guess it’s the San Andreas fault that’s causing all of this destruction, but it’s never flat out mentioned. Which I thing was smartly played from an artistic point of view.  Then we’re met with shot after shot of buildings falling, and people running, all while Paul Giamatti warns us that “even though it’s happening in California, we’ll feel it on the east coast.”

Dun, dun, dun!!!  Wait, didn’t this happen in “2012?”…and “Independence Day?”  Was this directed by Roland Emmerich?  Well, no it wasn’t. But it’s all extremely familiar.

Will the movie be good? Highly doubtful. But as trailers go, this thing did a great job of setting a dark tone and I think it achieved what it was trying to do. Its’ only downfall as a whole is that we’ve seen this all a billion times, and can probably predict that Ray and his whole family will come out happily reunited and completely unscathed by the end.  Of course, I could be bashing this all to be proven wrong by some awesome twist that director Brad Peyton has in store for us!

I guess we’ll find out on May 29th when “San Andreas” cracks open all over the nation. Ha!…That was dumb.